Minimal Exposure trip, mostly 3rd Year Immersion and barbecued chicken heads.

Just yesterday we had our exposure trip to Brgy. Bagong Silang. Being from the Ateneo High School interacting with kids from communities like the ones we saw was nothing new to me. We had to do something like that once a year from 1st to 3rd year. Fourth year was every Thursday. Still, I find communicating with the kids kind of difficult because of the awkward language barrier.

The whole thing went by quite smoothly thanks to the expert party planning of Cher and Mico, and of course the wonderful hosting skills of Alvin Cabalquinto. The kids from Bagong Silang were nice enough and really excited to be part of the games. I couldn't help but compare the trip to the things we used to do in high school though. During our 4th year, we had TD sessions every week. This meant lesson plans every week, trying to find new ways of teaching English, looking up the topic on the internet and attaining a rudimentary grasp of the topic (Prepositions...I'm sorry kids). It became really tedious really fast, but the year that I spent teaching them allowed for me to form a bond with them. The kids at Bagong Silang, not so much. That's just because I haven't spent time with them yet.

Two other kids, Jasper and Jasmine became my foster siblings during my 3rd year immersion in Payatas. Rather than writing about it, I'll post the paper I had to do after the trip. I must warn you, it gets really cheesy. And even then coherence and unity were alien to me. Also, I'll be adding comments in absolutely heterosexual and totally not insecure blue.

Immersion Reflection Paper

            Getting on the jeep to Payatas I was already pumped up for the weekend my classmates and I were going to spend there. I could see my classmates were too, especially Kim. “Parang tayo yung special ops na sasabak sa giyera!” he would say over and over again. That’s kind of what I thought too. Only a few of my classmates chose to join and that made all of the people there daring and bold (Cheesus Christ). I was glad I joined the immersion.

            

             When we got off the jeep, first thing everyone noticed was the smell. It wasn’t unbearable but it was still unpleasant. You could tell the dumpsite wasn’t that far away from where we were going to stay. The thought of that only excited me more since I wanted to see for myself what I could endure and this was something I was determined to undergo (I was a regular Bear Grylls).

            We had the meeting in the chapel and we were eventually separated and introduced to our foster families. That was the time I met Kuya Willy, my foster father for the immersion, and his two kids, Jasmine and Jasper. He seemed very friendly and greeted me with a wide grin. Then, we took the walk towards the house I was going to be sleeping in for two nights. I took that as a chance to survey the surroundings and I got good vibes from the place. People were busy chatting and kids were playing in the streets, everyone knew everybody else and they were generally nice people. After the short trip we managed to get to the house. It was small but cozy and had everything I needed to make it through my stay. There I sat down and tried to get to know the kids a bit more. The formal talk didn’t work and they both shied away (Evidence of the language barrier). Kuya Willy sensed that I was getting bored so he told Jasper to give me a wider(?) tour of the place. Walking around the area I was a bit apprehensive because I heard that there were frats and gangs in some areas and I did not want to get tangled up with them but I walked on. I got into somewhat of a confrontation with some punk teens playing with their skateboard but I think that was just me being easily intimidated (no shit, you little bitch), which I just realized now, but back then it left a bitter taste in my mouth. After that encounter, Jasper brought me to the lugawan and we sat a bit. I asked the man selling lugaw how much it was and he offered me a free bowl. It wasn’t a big deal but it felt really good to get something out of another person’s kindness (Already delicious lugaw is made even more delicious when it is given to you for free). It didn’t end there right after I finished my bowl of lugaw, my classmate’s ate bought me betamax. It was the first time I tried it outside of dinuguan and it was awesome! (Tasted like tofu) After that snack we went back home and had dinner. It was simple tinola but it was good (It was god damn delicious). I was careful not to eat too much because I was afraid I’d leave them with none but I managed to eat my fill anyway with enough to spare for the dog. Then we sat to watch the news and had a little light conversation. When the time came to go to bed, they set up the only fan in the house on the bed they set up for me. It was really touched by this and I found getting to sleep really easy (I did feel pretty bad I took their fan though). That is how I spent my first day.

            The second day of immersion Jasper and I met up with my classmates and we decided to walk all the way to the dumpsite and do some sightseeing. It was a long walk and when we got there we were covered in mud and our feet were wet with garbage water. One of my classmates, Dags, even got maggots on his slippers. It was gross but according to the Kuya Willie it’s a lot better that how it used to be. We gladly left the dump and went back to bathe and rest up. After a few kwentos and sticks of isaw later, we agreed to spend our last night singing at Miso’s crib (Videoke style). The night was killer and everyone enjoyed but with it I was reminded that we were leaving the next day. I dreaded the next day since I already got attached to my foster family and the community. I realized how much I was going to miss the sounds of people playing basketball in the street and the amazing variety of food available. I was going to miss playing chess with Jasper and talking to him about everyday things. It’s funny to think how much I connected within such a short span of time but it happened (I hate your sentence construction, 3rd year Rap). The next day when we left, some of us where in tears, I was among them (Not that many tears). Jasper cried too and I gave him something to cheer him up and remember me by. It was one of the few occasions where I gave and it hurt since I gave away my favorite keychain. I doubt I’ll be able to get another one of those anytime soon since they were limited edition (That keychain was so cool...I'm still glad I gave it away though). Emotions won me over that day. We left Payatas as different people, we were all changed. Even though our stay was too short, the lives that affected us and the lessons we learned will never be forgotten.

End.

I didn't get to mention the awesome deep friend chicken heads I tried for the first time. So awesome. Chewy. Juicy. Chickeny. It's chicken deliciousness presented in a neat little chicken head sized mouthful. I had chicken heads for the second time on the exposure trip. Barbecue this time. My god. The deliciousness. I seem to be the only one who enjoyed them as much though... More for me then. :D

On a semi-sidenote, I mentioned before the story of the that Atenean who's essay was criticized because he or she said that he or she was glad that she was not poor. I also said that I would discuss that further. But, since I don't wanna go at it all uninformed (not actually reading the essay), I'll leave that for some other time...again.

Now. Enjoy these photos of the exposure trip in panorama, a camera setting which I love using despite the occasional deforming of people.

Yes, I see my knuckle.

Albert and Ren not gaying it up yet.

Mariel's elbow has disappeared.

The Chillest Weekend Ever and Other Thoughts

This past weekend has been the chillest in a long time. Absolutely no homework or schoolwork done. It probably has much to do with the fact that math midterms has just blown by and I feel like I deserve to give myself some time to prep and relax before I see my terrible math grade. Sort of like when Filipinos beat the living shit out of a chicken before cooking it.

That chicken sure looks relaxed.

Why am I writing a second blogpost right after i had just accomplished one just yesterday? Probably because I wanted to hear myself think. Or read myself think. But then again, maybe the real reason why I'm writing is because I want to have something to look back at in the future. Somehow leave my mark. I've kept diaries journals before when I was a kid but I could never find it in myself to look back and re-read the entry. I put too much of myself into the diary and it exposes too much of myself to myself. This way at least I can keep some sort of record of my life and not have to see the bare thought on paper.

* * *

I have this fear. I like to talk about religion. At least for a little while. But even I get tired of talking about it. People usually get tired before me. My friend Jules told me that I was just joining the bandwagon when I argue about religion. He says that it's easy to argue against something that you can't prove. Jokingly, I remarked that it was way cooler to argue against how math works. He thought I was serious and he agreed. Goddamn Balma.

* * *

Earlier today, I was having a conversation with Aimee about what a guy like me can do with his life. Here's a list of things I might enjoy doing for a living.

1. Writer of erotic fiction

2. Doctor at a hospital in Boracay

3. Traveler

4. International Businessman

5. TV documentary show host

None of those seem too plausible. I don't wanna get a real job. Or work for a boring ass company. Or become a slave to money. I want to see the world. My mother did that when she was younger. She was a flight attendant and she went all over the world with friends. I'd listen to her crazy adventures as a kid and wait for her flight back just to get to the chocolates and toys she'd be bringing. It seemed like an amazing way to live. Which might explain why this was my list before I ended high school.

1. Pilot

2. Zoologist

3. Doctor

4. Lawyer

5. Writer of TV commercials

Basically, anything but businessman.

That does bring up an interesting thought though. Number five. Creativity. Money. Convincing people. Embellishing. That does sound like fun. It's a thought that I haven't visited in a while... Who knows. This could be a turning point in my life. I'll discuss this some other time. Until then, hello future me.

Regular Blogging

Blogging is tedious work. You have to find interesting things to say and or find mundane ideas and bedazzle them to somehow make them entertaining. Keeping an online diary journal is pretty gay. (Even with the use of the word journal. I guess it's the use of the strikethrough.) Not as gay as video diaries though.

PatheticGirl43's video journal

Best show ever.

At the risk of being gay however, I will recount on event that took place yesterday. Right before the math midterms Deo, Aimee, Jules and I were discussing the prospect of obtaining a condo unit and dividing the expenses among ourselves. I thought it was brilliant. Us guys just living the independent college life. Having ramen noodles every night. Watching the cars in Katipunan from the roofdeck (oh Christmas party...).  Whether we'd actually get any school work done though...

I wish college life was that cool. Where you leave your home and live away from your family. Live independently. Find yourself. Discover what you wanna do in life. College so far is like, high school with girl schoolmates and a lot of breaks. Maybe I should be working harder on the self-realization part. I remember a conversation I had with Leo Liban. He was talking about going on a journey of self-realization. If he was strict on the Honey and Clover (totally heterosexual reference) aspect of it, that would mean taking a bicycle and going on a journey with nothing but a backpack of clothes, spare change in your pocket and no maps or direction in mind. (Tch. Yeah right, Leo. HAHAHAHAHA.)

Also, thanks to my new phone I can post pics of recent events.

Arthur, Jules and myself

Us during the first sem

Toni before ACET results...

...Toni after ACET results.

To my sister, it's totally fine that you failed. There are other schools out there. :)

Kidding. She passed.

My room in panoramic view.

The block in panoramic view. (Mico's Spider-man)

The End.

Did not do Homework (So I blogged about my Atheism)

Heyyyy. A second blog entry. After only one day. Time to waste time.

Instead of doing homework. I didn't do homework. I also listened to Tim Minchin, a pretty good comedian/musician. I discovered him through Filipino Freethinkers where he was presenting the "true message of Christmas". (I use quotation marks only because people have been unable to define what "true" really is. It really just depends on from what perspective you're using.) Here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCNvZqpa-7Q&feature=channel

Terribly good stuff. :')

The message was true enough for me. 

This brings up an interesting point. If you know me, you'll know I've abandoned belief in God for almost a year or two already. Earlier I started with an uneasy questioning stage. My religion teachers from first year to second year were the first ones to have be ask questions about God. Wait. Scratch that. It was really my 7th Grade teacher. That was because I had just finished the da Vinci Code. Please do not be too hasty in judging me. I'll admit, I totally bought it with the Mary Magdalene and the Holy Blood... (I was a kid! After watching Space Jam when I was an even younger kid, I thought you could dig a whole into Looney Tunes land. aaaand I have no idea how saying that helps me...) Most importantly though it was the idea of questioning Jesus that hit me like a brick wall. Not in a bad way, mind you. It opened up the possibility of questioning God and Jesus when I had been too afraid to cross that sacred infallible line. I became curious enough to ask the big questions.

The topic of religion is often one that is accompanied by a long series of arguing and bickering. In the end no one really wins. You really just pick your poison. I just chose to pick the more certain path. One where I didn't need to listen to an invisible voice in my head or sacrifice virgins or give way to old nonsense beliefs that the pain of childbirth is a result of God's punishing Eve or one that holds rallies screaming: "God Hates Fags!"

What I do believe in is friends and family and science and just talking about things peacefully. (I realize my terrible use of "and" and "or") Not believing in a supernatural god has become a luxury and I find myself totally unchanged aside from the fact that I have become more open minded, more suspicious of unscientific claims, more supportive of homosexuals (I only just kid around, AC.), more appreciative of the complexity of the world, more critical of the stupid government and Catholic Church and aside from a lot more things, happier to be alive today.

I always say this to people who ask me what meaning there is in being alive but having no creator. I tell them that it is up to them to decide. Our very existence today laughs in the face of improbability yet with enough knowledge of the science behind it, works perfectly with how the universe operates. We are here today in spite of incredible odds. So many things had to go right just for you to be here today. It is just too easy to say that God made everything and accept and worship. When you do that you miss the beauty of the how's, what's, where's and when's. The "why", on the other hand, depends on you. You have this literally once in a lifetime chance to make a good life, live with your family and be happy with others in what way you choose. You are in control of how your life will go. You choose how you want to live. I think it's wonderful that way and not a day goes by where I don't have that lingering feeling of luck and amazement when I realize that I am alive. My classmate and fellow Green Lantern fan, Ren Aquino, said something about how in the grand scheme of things we are just but an excess in the reaction. That may be, but that still puts forward the inescapable fact that we ARE. Here we are. That certainly put a smile on my face the night he shared it. It still does to this day.

* * *

I could go on and on about my beliefs but then that would just be tedious. There are so many facets in belief that you'd need a book or a series of books to go about it correctly. Also, thanks to Aimee for the blog support. It actually feels good to post thoughts for everyone to read. :)

Blog#1 (1-1-11)

Today I decided to start a blog. I guess it has partly to do with the fact that I have never done something like this before. An entire decade has gone by in this millennium and I still live the same humdrum life of a potato. So here I am...blogging about the humdrum life of a potato...

The year just ended. Normally we have boring Christmases and New Year celebrations. This year however was different. Must have been my blossoming into my true self. (Hurray for self-esteem!) I'll start my How-2010-Ended-Story with my birthday...

On December 24, I officially became 19 years of age. I remember the moments before I turned 19 all I could do what hug myself try and savor 18 year old Rap as much as I could (I can read your thoughts you disgusting pervert). My facebook wall was already dotted with greetings here and there, and I was counting down the seconds to my 19th birthday. When the the clock struck 12 I got lots and lots of greetings. And that was "My 19th birthday" by Rap-rap Abacan of Grade 3 Lakandula. Sounds boring. Maybe it's because birthdays really are unspecial. They're just days like any other. You just happen to have completed one more orbit around the Sun. They do provide a nice time to reflect on the past. The people I've met. The fun times. The shit times. You realized how fast time flies. How soon you're going to die. How lucky you are to be alive and literate enough to make a shitty blog.*

Back to the story.

After a day of not really doing anything. My family and I had dinner at Manila Peninsula (That place in Makati where all the rich people go and where the military stormed in with a tank). Probably the fanciest place I've been to. The dinner was amazing. Turkey with cranberry sauce, hot gravy and stuffing. HAM with apple sauce. Lamb with red wine sauce. A 3-foot wide wheel of parmesan where they mix your Caesar salad in (that made it taste AWESOME). And endless CHERRIES. It was ridiculously amazing. As a result I had to hide my equally ridiculous belly by not breathing until we got to the car. That dinner was also when my family (actually just my mom) gave me my Christmas gift: a touchscreen phone. For those of you who know the kind of phone I've been using for over the past 2 or 3 years, you'll understand why I started to cry in front of everyone at Manila Pen... Just kidding. I did make this face though ---> :V

That did it for the night. It was a good day that day. I love birthdays.

Then came Christmas. I managed to figure out the basics of using my phone such as why it wouldn't work with my sim card (I didn't put it in yet (that's what she said (sigh))). Then my tito came and had lunch with us. We opened Christmas gifts. I still actually got a Christmas gift too! Yeahhhh... Big shift from the last Christmas...I got a little clip thing for notes.... The gift I got this year was a shot tic tac toe set. Which also made me go--- :V This will later play a crucial role in the subsequent awesomeness of my Christmas. Also, Toni got a brand new computer printer...which is now installed in my computer. GIFT STEAL HIGH FIVE!!! HAHAHA!!! sorry toni. not.

That night my cousins came over. Must have been almost half a year since I last saw them or spoke to them. What better way to bond than by getting blasted through shot tic tac toe. My rules made this game awesome. 1 shot for when you guys get a draw. 2 shots for when you lose. Simple, right? Earlier that day my mom told me the "rules" or the "proper way of playing". It's a race apparently. You put down the X's and O's and whoever goes last loses. THAT DID NOT MAKE SENSE. There were more X pieces than O pieces so X is always last. I told her that and she said, "Edi, you jack-en-poy to figure out who's first!" THEN THAT'S SHOT JACK-EN-POY!!! I tried playing by her rules just to humor her. Then my tito makes a line of his own pieces in the middle of the game and tells me I need to take a shot. Then I'm like, "What?!!? You guys said that's not how this works!" Then my mom agrees and tells me I need to take the shot. What the hell! That shit was bananas. Anyways, that night we played by my rules. And that night became awesome. Will not get into details. Here's the short version: got drunk. went to playground. went home. hugged grandma. slept in bathroom. slept on bed. Merry Christmas 2010.

goddamn. this blog entry became longer than i thought it would be.

AND WE GET TO NEW YEAR.

I was kinda sad at the start of it because it wouldn't be like Christmas. I wouldn't be with my cousins or my other members of my extended family. That changed though when I remembered that tradition of playing Auld Lang Syne. I listened to it and I guess I got the whole point of the celebrations. It's the end of the year and time's always passing us buy. We have to make the most of it and just try to be happy with everyone else. Beautiful message. I never really bothered to get the lyrics and I sort of just got that from the vibe I was getting...so if it turns out to be about punching babies in the face...my bad. We went to mass at 5:30 pm as part of our tradition. When my mom told us we would go, I said, "We're still going pala." She then said, "Atheist ka talaga." Awkward silence and walks away.... Haha. After that wonderful and captivating service nothing much happened again and I went online. Then I played CoD. Then I watched the hangover. Totally awesome by the way despite to ridiculous ending. Well, ridiculous everything. Awesome. Then the new year came. There was a countdown on ABS-CBN and at the exact moment of January 1st of 2011 I hit play on Auld Lang Syne. It was awesome. Fireworks all around. Our neighbors the Ibays went insane with their fireworks this year. I loved it. I seriously double rainbowed. It was awesome. All around my house you could see all these rich ass people lighting up expensive fireworks that did things I never saw fireworks do. And it wasn't ignite a feeling of completion or love or something lame like that. They really did whizz around and do crazy shit in the air. But yeah I'll admit it, the music and the fireworks closed 2010 well and paved the way for 2011 just as well.

So there. That was 2010. Now it's 2011 and I just started a blog. Something I thought only chicks and Jason Karaan do. Maybe it'll be awesome. Maybe it'll suck. But whatever happens this coming year... Inspirational last sentence.

-THE END-

 *This reminds me of a student my Filipino Prof was talking about. Apparently, a few years back, there was this student who submitted a reflection essay his experience of living in a poor community. On the paper, he talked about how happy he was that he wasn't poor or at least how lucky he felt that he didn't have to live like that. That created or reaffirmed that stereotype of Ateneans to be proud rich bastards. Personally, I don't blame the guy. It is shit to be poor. To think otherwise is stupid. I'll get back on this some other time if I feel like it.